Tuesday, October 4, 2011

"DO YOU HAVE THE GUTS...?": 466 State Street

Jay-Z wants his cake, and he wants to eat it too. On the track "Brooklyn" in 2007, he bragged about "half a billie in the bankroll." Granted, this was prior to the financial crisis of 2008 and the potential double-dip we're experiencing now, but we imagine his half a billion dollar net worth shouldn't be too depleted these days. Afterall, on one of his latest singles, he asks, "What's 50 grand to a [mofo] like me, can you please remind me?" in reference to the NBA fining the New Jersey Nets $50K for minority owner Jay-Z appearing in the locker room of a supposedly-amateur college basketball team. But apparently all the braggadocio comes to a screeching halt when the subject of Brooklyn real estate prices comes up. In a recent Daily News article, Jay-Z says, he's "thinking about" moving to Brooklyn, but "prices are really high." Maybe he should have thought about that before bringing the Nets to Brooklyn, as Malcolm Gladwell uncovers in this article.

On the hit track from last year, "New York", Jay-Z also brags about his earlier days in more illicit activities, "...took it to my stash spot 560 State Street," which has now been converted to faux-fancy condos around the corner from the future Barclays Arena for his Nets. Boy, have times changed! Also on State Street, in a no man's land stretch of downtown Brooklyn we'll liberally call Boerum Hill here, comes 466 State Street. Ordinarily a 2-Family in Boerum Hill that needs even lots of work for $899K would be interesting. This place has some major caveats, though. The listing claims, in its original all-caps, "THIS PLACE NEEDS TO BE COMPLETELY RENOVATED FROM TOP TO BOTTOM. THERE IS NO NEED TO LOOK AT IT."

We honestly love the candor of the agent here. And it gets better:

"The tenant on the top floor will not leave. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO???????????DO YOU HAVE THE GUTS TO DEAL WITH THIS????if yes please call!!!!"

We like the Sgt. Slaughter-esque challenge by the broker to potential buyers.

It's not everyday that agents come this clean upfront about the flaws in their property. There's lots more to say about this place, but the listing's said enough for now.

Pro's: price point, curb appeal, technically very centralized, blank canvas

Con's: entrenched tenant, odd location, stop work order, lis pendens, SRO restricted, various complaints & violations filed with the city

Ideally: only a real trooper should take this on, and there's WAY better places to tackle if you've got this kind of might